Trashy Tabloid Headlines - SFL Edition

[ol man emu]

Reynella banks on new recruits.

[The Dutchman]

SAMPSON's puttin on the RITZ

[Backliner]

Ca$$ius Clay

[MR JUICY]

Emu's thinks Clay is Pongy

[MR JUICY]

REDMUFF hit with a SHARD of SPUD

[Cheese Twisties]

Mudlarks purchase another Emu using CLAY-BUY

[hereforthebeer]

emu's howelling, as sampsons got his ritz about him

[BIG RED DELICIOUS 2]

"NEWSFLASH" A snake in the grass bites off more RITZ than he can chew!

[special]

emus run for cover as my-ponga sweaps throught the air.

[spot on]

Clay Pigeon shooting replaced by Clay emu shooting

[The Yetti]

Emus flock to Myponga / Sellicks area.

Locals in the Myponga / Sellicks Beach area are reporting huge mobs of Emus heading South. They seem to be coming from the Morphett Vale area where the housing estates have forced them from their normal grazing area. The Clay soils of Myponga are ideal for the Emus favourite food...Strawberry Clover. The strawberry Clover is also very important for the new Pink milk which has become a real focus for the Myponga dairy farmers.

The Emus are of course a protected species, and local farmers are reluctant to shoot them. According to one of the dairyfarmers it seems that Myponga will need to spend some money at the local sporting complex to keep the emus at the oval. It is understood that there has been money put aside from the latest grant to house at least five of the marauding emus at the oval.
A spokesman from the Yankalilla council has also remarked on how these emus seem to be much darker...almost black with a tinge of red across their chest. However the spokesman said, they seem to be developing a more greeny gold colour the longer they stay at Myponga.

In late news just to hand, from Willunga. Local Identies have confirmed that the same thing happened at Willunga in the late eighties when several emus came to Willunga. They too seemed to change colour...but to Red and White...believed to be from the red and white grapes that the emus eat. These emus have bred and seem to have established themselves at Willunga Oval. It seems that with the redirection of Aldinga Road a couple of years back, has not stopped the influx of sharks to Willunga.

[MR JUICY]

Yetti - that is superbly written - bloody classic - love your work!

[The Yetti]

Yetti - that is superbly written - bloody classic - love your work!

Thankyou. I was inspired!!!!

[recruiter 10]

Myponga President has come out and stated "If we dont win more games than last year this club obviously does not know the difference between sh1t and clay"

[Titanic]

Emus at firing range,shooting CLAY targets !!!

[pale ale]

Clay to find out - Emus Hate Mud

[Deemu]

Mudlark CLAYms innocence after being seen taking TOWELs from the RITZ.

[Deemu]

"NEWSFLASH" A snake in the grass bites off more RITZ than he can chew!

interesting......

[The Dutchman]

Bank pays interest on SMITH

[Cheese Twisties]

Emus recent Ca$hius problems get compounded by new ironBANK interest hikes